Yet Another Unitarian Universalist
A postmodern heretic's spiritual journey.
We have long wondered what it was that mad scientists drink while working in their labs. Surely not Coke or Pepsi. Herbal tisanes? Extra dry Martinis? Postum?
But now Carol has discovered exactly what it is that mad scientists drink: “Fresh” brand in Buwah-hah-hah flavor:
An old friend called me up yesterday, and told me a story. They were traveling, in a strange city over a weekend, and wanted to go to church. The sermon topic at the local Unitarian Universalist church: “Consciousness.” The sermon topic at the hip Christian church in town: “Bad Girls of the Bible.”
If this were you, which church would you attend? — and why?
Google Reader is going away July 1. Carol has found a good replacement: theoldreader.
And just remember: if you’re not paying for it, your data is the product (except for things like this blog which are part of the hobby economy).
One of the middle schoolers from our congregation went to a gun control rally, and a photo with him in it appeared on Barack Obama’s Facebook page. How cool is that?
Click on the image above to see the caption inserted by Obama’s social media staff: “Harrison Frahn listens to a speech on reducing gun violence at a candlelight vigil in Palo Alto, CA.” I’m sure Obama never even saw this post; I’m sure Obama has forgotten the year or two he spent in a Unitarian Universalist Sunday school; I’m sure that Obama’s social media team merely posted this because it’s a good photo to further their political goals. Nevertheless, it’s really fun to see a UU kid recognized in this way — recognized for taking a public stand on something he cares about.
I received an interesting and thoughtful comment via email on a sermon titled “Marriage as a Religious Act” which I recently posted on my main Web site. I realized that this sermon relates to some issues you, dear readers, and I have addressed on this blog — most importantly, the sexual revolution within Unitarian Universalism, and the theological basis (if any) for marriage in our tradition. Since this is something we have talked about here, and since I greatly value the comments I get from you, I decided to post this sermon and see what you might have to say about it. The sermon beging below the fold.
Wynne, chair of the board, asked us each to introduce ourselves by giving our names, our roles, and then by saying “five words about what you like about this season.”
Being Unitarian Universalists who like to talk, none of us kept to the five word limit. Except Louis, who said:
“After apocalypse, days get longer.”
I always need clean Christmas jokes, the kind of thing you can tell to a fifth grader. Philip came through for me in a big way this year. Below are some of the jokes he passed along to me. As the reindeer comedian said, These will sleigh you!
What do elves learn in school?
The elfabet.
How many letters in the elfabet?
Only twenty-five, because of Noel.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
What do psychiatrists call someone who is afraid of Santa?
Claustrophobic.
Little boy: “Mom, can I have a dog for Christmas?”
Mother: “No, you’ll have turkey like everyone else in the family.”
Mother: “What’s the best thing to put into a Christmas cake?”
Little girl: “Your teeth.”
Little boy: “Teacher, what do you call Santa’s helpers?”
Teacher: “Subordinate Clauses.”
OK, that’s the last joke. You can stop groaning now.
So James Pierpont, the guy who wrote “Jingle Bells,” was a Unitarian, and worked as the music director at the Unitarian church in Savannah, Georgia, before the Civil War — and before that church has to close down because it leaned strongly Abolitionist. But “Jingle Bells” is not in any Unitarian Universalist hymnal. If you want to sing it during a Sunday service, here’s an arrangement laid out on a half-letter-size sheet, that you can stick into the typical order of service:
(This arrangement is from an early edition of Pierpont’s sheet music, available online at the Library of Congress.)
Here’s Dad’s Christmas tree:
This requires a bit of explanation. The aluminum foil under the tree is a nice Christmas-y touch, looking a little like ice and/or snow. But it’s also the ground plane for the vertical antenna for Dad’s 2 meter rig 40 meter rig — you can see the antenna sparkling in the lights just to the left of the tree.
This is about as cool as Christmas decorations can get.
It’s Hallowe’en, and Amy, the parish minister here in Palo Alto, is going to preach on the zombie apocalypse this Sunday. All this means it’s time for more zombie jokes:
What does the dyslexic zombie eat?
BRIANS!
What did the large animal vet zombie eat?
MurRAINS!
What does the zombie of Fantasy Island shout?
Da PLANES! Da PLANES!
What does zombie Mitt Romney say?
I was CEO of BAIN!
A zombie walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you, want to try it?” The zombie says, “Sure, give me a Charles.”
Continue reading “Zombie jokes”